I recieved an e-mail from the Barmy Army today. It related to selling Ashes tickets at Cardiff (another beef entirely). Contained within it was the following…
“At the same time as booking your ticket we are asking you to pre-order your Barmy Army Ashes Shirt for next summer. The reason? Well, not only will we give you a £5 discount if you order now, but we have a little plan up our sleeve (no pun intended, well maybe a little one).
During the victorious 2005 Ashes Series the Australian supporters all wore the same shirts. This had a dramatically positive effect on the Australian team as they had a focal point to go to when they needed a boost from their supporters.
We aim to go one better and create a HUGE St George’s Cross made up of all of our polo shirts in our section; the middle rows in both directions will have red fronts and those in the four corners will have white shirts, all will have the Ashes Tour design on the back. In order to make this happen we need to do some serious planning. As you can imagine, ordering the right shirts for each day, in the right sizes and seating all of you with your friends and relatives is quite a time-consuming exercise so please help us by committing to this early.”
First of all, the Australian gaggle that all wore the same t-shirt at the Ashes series appeared to be part of an organised sports tour. There must have been 50, tops, of the muppets, if I recall correctly (and attempts to corroborate these memorable people via online research has not borne much fruit). Their presence inspired such a dramatic positive effect that the Baggie Greens were outplayed for 90% of three test matches and lost the Ashes for the first time in 18 years. The Australian collective fashion attire when showing their patriotism is the bloody green and gold – I can’t even recall their “same shirt” as it was that memorable. All I seem to recall was a small knot of supporters in homage to Merv Hughes sitting on top of the Edrich/Compton at Lord’s and in the Surridge at the Oval.
The Barmy Army can shout all they like about the support we give the England team at home, but this exercise in selling more t-shirts is just a cynical marketing ploy and says more about what the Barmy Army has evolved into than its original purpose/raison d’etre in its early innocent days.
In my view, it started off as the England cricket supporters poking fun at themselves by following the losing Ashes team of 1994-5 around with unstinting support. It evolved, in my eyes, from an organisation of self parody but support, to a useful conduit to facilitate the dream tours for me – self-organised, free lancing, go-as-you-please and see the cricket holidays – rather than the previous options espoused by the right royal take-ons of Kuoni Sport Abroad, Gullivers or the other type of rubbish put forward by cricket clubs, which took you on guided tours, 4* hotels and nice pre-packaged shirts and hand luggage. Being stuck behind them in the passport queue at Brisbane airport, with tens of people in the same corporate shirt, is soul destroying.
The reality, dressed up as patriotism, is that the Barmy Army, with its “membership”, “privileged ticket allocations”, organised specific Barmy Army fan areas, marketing etc. is now moving from beyond what I believed its core aims were, namely to assist those who wanted to go to cricket but didn’t want to be straight-jacketted into stupid membership schemes and the corporate whoredom prevalent in so many sports, to, frankly, becoming just like those that it sought to foil.
Now they trumpet this idea. Oh great, buy a t-shirt, get in uniform, get behind “the boys”. If “the boys” can’t be inspired by the Ashes, I’m worried. If the boys can’t recognise the lengths people went to Down Under to freelance, and still get in despite Cricket Australia’s utter desperation to keep us out – and note that the Barmy Army, in its keenness to help out let a lot of people down – then Lord knows what hope we have. The t-shirt idea, while harmless, is symptomatic of an organisation fast becoming another “club” to buy tickets, and to take the opportunity for tickets, the key thing after all, out of the hands of people who don’t want to be straight-jacketed or labelled.
Cards on the table. I get into the Oval for test matches due to my Surrey Membership, so I am a member of a club to get in – and I have also benefitted from corporate seats – believe it or not, my motivation has never been to schmooze, because I have little to schmooze about, but to watch the game, and team, I love. I havealso used the Barmy Army to get test tickets at Cape Town, although, I understand, at the time I applied to them it would have been easy to get them directly from the Western Province Cricket Association. That service was excellent and required no “membership fee”.
My mates got the Ashes tickets both times around by hook or by crook, when Cricket Australia did all they could to stop English supporters buying them. It fractured the army, but their presence was still there. Free-lancing was becoming more and more difficult. Now the Barmy Army are, even if they don’t mean to, taking tickets out of free-lancers hands.
I can be accused of hypocrisy. I think the t-shirts on sale are usually quite funny, and I have bought a waterproof coat with Barmy Army on it. But, as the theme common throughout of this piece shows, I am less comfortable with them charging a fee to buy tickets in designated areas because in so doing they become more like Kuoni and that lot, which, in my view, is not what they were meant to be when they set out on this road.
I’m probably being hard on the Barmy Army. Their heart, I believe, is in the right place. I am not so sure they are a home country organisation, but more a club of like minded people on tour to whom you know you can get together with inside the ground to get behind the team. I think their finest hours were in Adelaide last time, when despite all attempts by Cricket Australia to prevent it, they congregated, sung, and supported the team brilliantly. We lost, and the Aussies milked it in front of them. We just stood their stunned and took it. With the Aussies competing with the “Barmy Army”, we could have guessed what the attitude would have been from them if the roles had been reversed, judging by their conduct on days previous. It was what the “Army” is all about, but now seems more like the organisations it seemed to pit itself against.